Political Impact on Self Image

I haven't written for a few days because I really don't want this forum to be a solely political themed blog.  I'm sure as time goes by I will be writing about various topics spanning the whole spectrum of possibilities and thoughts that wander into and through my  head.  But for now I have been focused on politics because of the recent election cycle and I have to say that I find myself ever more frustrated with the viewpoints coming from the right.  So I decided to continue posting and sharing thoughts, even though they currently remain focused on what's going on in the country politically.

Now I'm the first one to admit that I'm certainly not a complete left wing bleeding heart liberal, as they say, but rather very much in the middle.  I guess I'm a moderate centrist?  As I get older I do find that I become more conservative when it comes to some things, while maintaining a definitely more liberal stance on others.  And on some issues I'm smack dab in the middle.  I truly believe that the majority of people in this country are somewhat in that grey area as I am, and yet the focus seems to remain on one extreme or the other.

My rant for this evening continues to focus on being appalled at the complete and total hypocrisy displayed by most of the far right and religious right talking heads and how it impacts me so personally.  I hear this ongoing drumbeat of smaller and less intrusive government, which is even more magnified among the tea party crowd.  They talk a good game and preach the message that government should stay out of people's lives.  Yet they are the first people who want to legislate their religious and moral beliefs on everyone else.

I guess I'm just feeling so personally impacted and oppressed lately by the political climate.  It has taken the vast majority of my life to come to terms with certain aspects of my being, and I still struggle with others.  There are days that my self esteem and sense of self worth is completely nonexistent and I just want so much to give up on it all.  And then I realize that I have such a wonderful group of friends and family that genuinely love and value me and that's what makes the day by day grind much more tolerable.  It can sure be a roller coaster ride of emotions going from feeling helpless, worthless and alone to being loved and cared for by the most special people in the world that have been brought into my life and that I'm so humbled and honored that they are there, and always will be.

I wonder if the religious right and self-professed moral superiors really realize just what an impact they have on individuals.  Do they know just how powerful words can be and the consequences they can have?  They really only need look over the past few weeks at the young gay men who felt so alone and distraught that their mind convinced them the only option was to end their short lives.  These messengers of judgement, hate and condemnation truly believe they carry the light of truth, and I don't doubt their genuine beliefs, but do they stop to consider that the message they spread contributes to the extinguishing of bright and new lights that haven't even had a chance to truly shine?

I have been there myself many times in my life.  I have taken that handful of pills and made attempts to extinguish the light in me that I didn't want anyone to see.  I believed so strongly, because of societal views in past years, that if I didn't extinguish my own light that there were millions of people who would be glad to get in line to do it for me.  Yes, I've lived with a great deal of fear and guilt over many things, but I've worked very hard to overcome those fears and anxieties.  I've had success in many aspects but have a long way to go in others.  One of the things that has helped me get where I am today has been learning how and working hard to believe more in myself and less in what other people think.  Pretty hard to actually do that all the time, but it has gotten better.  I would just like to see people in power and/or the public eye take more personal responsibility for their words and actions, and consider what a powerfully negative personal impact it can have  on countless individuals. The consequences can, and have, resulted in the loss of so many fellow human beings that should have been loved and valued and cared for and supported rather than being judged and condemned and ridiculed and bullied and utterly devalued and cast away.

What will it take for us to respect each other again?  Why does disagreeing with someone mean you have to hate them?  I don't ask for love and don't need approval, but wouldn't a little tolerance, acceptance, recognition, and respect be nice?